Girl in tears

Yesterday night I while I was strolling along a quiet street, I was drawn to some very loud sobs coming from somewhere ahead of me. At first I thought my ultimate vampire fantasy was finally happening (kidding, just see Chapter One of my book Florid Eyes: A Novel and you’ll know what I’m talking about). I was actually worried that someone was about to jump off  from the roof or something.  

Turns out a woman was crying to her phone. She is about my age I’d say, also looking like she has just got off from work. I couldn’t quite make sense of what she was saying. The only thing I could hear through her sobs was, “I don’t wanna be with you. Just leave me alone.”

Perhaps I was thinking too much. I hope I was. I naturally assumed she was fighting with a man. A friend once said, “The only thing that could break down a woman is either a breakup or a career failure.” I think that’s spot on.

I tend to consider myself more empathetic than sympathetic, meaning I don’t get shaken by tragedies or sufferings that I’ve never experienced first person, but I REALLY feel for those whose experience I share. At that moment, I was taken back by how much her sorrow was affecting me. As I walked away, my mind drifted to the last time I had a good cry myself and was once again reminded of the excruciating pain. I had to force myself not to blink because my eyes were getting blurry also.

I have done what she was doing many many years ago, crying helplessly to the phone yelling at the person at the other end in public. I was in so much pain that I just couldn’t care less about what strangers thought about me. And I have seen my own mother doing that same thing. It was heart wrenching. As a fellow woman who sometimes falls too hard, I really do hope that girl is doing okay now.


About Nicky

Nicky English is a journalist, an educator, a podcaster, a couch potato, a dreamer, and a child at heart. Learning is her passion, so is the English language, which she believes is the tool to unlock the door of knowledge. Born in Hong Kong, she received intensive writing training at The University of Iowa, where she double-majored in journalism and political science. Apart from the Hawkeye State, she’s lived in Chicago and Philadelphia. When she was a guest student at Georgetown University, she fell in love with Washington, D.C. She also has a Master of Arts in Communication. A little side note—she cannot imagine a world without her Mac and iDevices. Like many crazy ones, she hopes to change the world one day at a time.
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